This listing was on Craigslist and entered the awesomeness hall of fame before some whiny little pussy got offended by it and flagged it for removal.

 Old POS plow truck - $2500 (fairmont)

1992 Chevy 3/4 ton
97,000 miles
350-EFI
4WD
Automatic TurboHydromatic 400- slips
Red and Black with factory flairs
Fisher Plow power lift and turn


$2500 cash or trade


Here's the deal, kids:
This is a Chevy Truck. This is not a luxury SUV, or a maintenance-free disposable import. It has almost new oversized rims and tires, wind noise, and character.
It's a Truck. It rides like a Truck. It drives like a Truck. All of these are GOOD things.
It is not new, it is not pristine, it is used. This will be apparent in the pictures



If you do not own a toolbox, have never changed your own oil, and are scared of firearms: THIS VEHICLE IS NOT FOR YOU.
If you have been posting on facebook all about how excited you are for pumpkin latte season: THIS VEHICLE IS NOT FOR YOU.
If you get offended easy and often, whine to your co-workers, and bitch a lot: THIS VEHICLE IS NOT FOR YOU.
If you feel you are owed anything in the world & have a bullshit job where you fail to produce: THIS VEHICLE IS NOT FOR YOU.
If you own a bieber album, white oakleys, affliction t-shirts, or those candy-assed stitched-pocket jeans: THIS VEHICLE IS NOT FOR YOU.
If you consider the 2nd Amendment an anachronistic relic and have never owned a firearm: THIS VEHICLE IS NOT FOR YOU.


If, however, you have BALLS OF STEEL and consider adverse weather an excuse to do stupid shit: THIS IS YOUR TRUCK.
Do you laugh at danger, and tempt fate? 
Have you ever uttered the words, "Hold my beer and watch this ..."?
While bored at work do you pick targets at random and think, "I could hit that from here with the .22 ..."?
Have any of your friends quit hanging out because you were too much fun?
Do you have the number of a friend with cash memorized for bail?
When you pass an abandoned flatbed farm truck along a fenceline do you consider taking on another project?
Is your ol' lady really sick of the random piles of parts, greasy footprints, and empty beer bottles in the garage?
-could you not care less?
Do you have Jalopnik saved on your laptop AND smartphone?
Do you own a service manual for every vehicle you ever owned?
Do you still miss your first ride?
Can you carry on a two hour conversation discussing tools, scars, and hi-lift jacks?

Remember when tool companies had the balls to put half-naked beauty queens on their calendars?
Do you consider the Prius an abominable affront to the Gods of displacement, torque, and All Mighty Internal Combustion?



If you answered in the affirmative to the preceding: THIS IS YOUR PLOW TRUCK.

DETAILS:
-I am the second owner. First owner barely got it dirty and engaged the front axles once.
-I have remedied this excessive caretaking with muddy roads and a pile of fun.
-The motor uses a little oil. How much? I don't know, I'm not collecting statistical analysis points. 
I check the oil, I fill the oil, I drive. Not enough to bother me. 
-It leaks a little oil. How much? Not enough for me to care. this truck is 21 years old, Poindexter!
If you have a vehicle that is 21 years old, NOT leaking or burning oil, it's empty!
-Rear bumper has a big-ass crease in it. I dented it backing into a concrete pole. Sober.
We drove away giggling, for the record. Haven't fixed it.
-Driver's side door was caught by the wind, whipped forward, got into the LF quarter panel.
-Radiator has a small leak. Pinhole. I can replace the radiator or you can. Really doesn't matter
A new radiator and hoses will run $145. If you don't want to replace them I will. 
Add $250 to the price of vehicle. This includes radiator, hoses, and labor (beer). A freaking bargain.
-The badass little 5.7L bullet-proof V8 starts and runs like the proverbial champ. 
- 4WD operate perfectly 
-Tires are big ass tires for the truck with no lift and 3/4 tread and don't match what do you expect on an old plow truck. 
-Zombie stickers on the right rear window stay. My daughter's idea, take it up with her.
-Rob Zombie sticker stays as well. They kick ass, so there


QUESTIONS:
-Why are you selling?
I can't justify owning it anymore. Motorsickles, kiddos, work, travel, and beer have consumed my time and money.
Someone else needs to appreciate the Truck for what it is: awesome mechanical artistry.

-What's wrong with it?
Radiator. Small oil leaks. Driver's side door cosmetic issues and trans slips. 
And did I say it comes with a spare trans. 
And it's pissed it has been neglected and parked. It needs rescued.

-Does the 4WD work?
Hell yes. Like a Dickensian Orphan. 

-Will you sell me the [engine / plow / rear door / axle / etc.]?
No. I'm not in the salvage business. Buy the Truck. Love the Truck. Give the Truck a home.

-Will you take [insert ridiculously stupid low number here]?
No. If I wanted [ridiculously low number] I would have asked [ridiculously low number]
Want a cheap car? Get your kid that lowered tuner piece of shit honda project down the road. 
I think I'm plenty cheap for this bad mofo.


-Why is it still stock?
Because I bought it to plow snow and do the heavy work, none of that bullshit K&N filters here just a new $5 fram every year.
chevy built it right so its stock except tires and rims they sucked that year. I bought a new plow truck. So I am selling it.

-Can I put a 6" lift and giant tires on it?
I don't give a shit. But be sure to use quality components and for God's sake - get it aligned after a lift!

-Would this make a good car for my daughter?
Hell. Yes. Not only a good car, a learning experience. Introduction to vehicular maintenance.
Additionally, there isn't really enough room in the back for that little bastard she's dating to try anything.

-Can you deliver?
Within reason. I'd drive it a hundred miles or so. But really, you should come get it. Look it over. Have a beer. Etc.

-Will you take a check / cashier's check / Western Union Transfer / Nigerian Promissory Note?
Would you take a ball pein hammer to the forehead?
No. I'll take Cash. Period. Bring cash or don't show.

-Will you ship to -?
No. See above.

-No, really, all I have is [lowball dollar amount]?
That's great, I don't give a shit. Unicef ain't running this deal, and until they do I want $2500. 
Why? Because I don't HAVE to sell this little beauty. Truth be known, I'd rather keep it.
But if it's going to a good home - I will sell. Unless you're an asshole - then no sale.

-Why are you such a dick?
Everything is relative; you should see my friends.

Any other questions, feel free to reply to this email and ask

• Location: fairmont
• it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests

Welcome back 8088er  :-)

Somebody should do a re-do and do "in flight" re-fueling from another tanker truck while rolling down the highway at speed.

What I don't understand is why the cabin had a fuel smell in it.  Properly connected fuel tanks should not ventilate into the cabin no matter how big they are or where they're located.

Yesterday morning in cologne:

http://www.koeln.de/files/images/fahrkunst-cz-1000.horizontal.jpg

(and, no photoshop. http://fbcdn-sphotos-d-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-ash4/q74/s720x720/1469964_171889906343463_276014476_n.jpg saw it too ;-)

Damn! That must have taken some doing.

It's pretty easy, you just throw the automatic transmission into "Sideways"

Mon Nov 11 2013 05:47:12 PM EST from IGnatius T Foobar @ Uncensored

What I don't understand is why the cabin had a fuel smell in it.  Properly connected fuel tanks should not ventilate into the cabin no matter how big they are or where they're located.

Propane fridge in use at the cabin?  Might want to check the pilot light.  I am surprised you have Internet, but not enough electricity to run the fridge.  If it stinks like rotten eggs (my dad sold natural gas for years)... you might want to get that figured out sooner rather than later.  It is not explosive at most mixtures, but when it builds up to the right ratio, it is not a good situation.