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[#] Tue Aug 18 2015 11:17:15 EDT from dothebart

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so... Gemalto isn't an open organisation. One was prohibited to change lightbulbs (or even disable flickering neon-tubes)

And it wasn't just lightbulbs, it was more like "you mustn't do this and that and this rather never. Why? you don't have to care for that. Its been decided."

One of the other things which I really don't miss.

[#] Tue Aug 18 2015 13:12:44 EDT from fleeb

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Heh, it sounds like a setup for a bad joke.

"How many employees at Gemalto does it take to change a lightbulb? Trick question... they aren't permitted to change lightbulbs!"

[#] Thu Aug 20 2015 09:30:05 EDT from IGnatius T Foobar

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And it wasn't just lightbulbs, it was more like "you mustn't do this
and that and this rather never. Why? you don't have to care for that.
Its been decided."

That sounds like union work. Everything is siloized and hyper-protected for no particularly good reason.

[#] Thu Aug 20 2015 14:56:51 EDT from fleeb

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Southwest Airlines proved that unions make workers miserable.

[#] Thu Aug 20 2015 17:03:10 EDT from dothebart

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well, in europe there is another power which is liable for these kind of things: Berufsgenossenschaft: (its got so many english words I can't decide which one fits best)

its got even more powers than labour unions. Being member in one is mandatory for every company. They have an eye on unsafe work conditions, since its them who have to pay compensation when things go wrong.

I.e. my accident with my knee on the way to work 4 years ago - they paid the hospital bill, recovery therapy etc.

[#] Mon Aug 31 2015 05:15:54 EDT from dothebart

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hm, did anybody try this yet:

have some random noise on your headphones...

well, I don't especially need a diesel engine... but maybe there is other stuff.


[#] Tue Oct 20 2015 10:05:55 EDT from fleeb

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VP promises potential customer for a demo.

VP then asks if anyone is available to do said demo.

All the people who have ever done the demos before are on vacation or contracts.
But the promise has been made.


[#] Tue Oct 20 2015 10:25:21 EDT from fleeb

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Increasingly, I feel like I'm living in a personalized form of the movie 'Brazil', made just for me.

[#] Tue Oct 20 2015 13:01:55 EDT from fleeb

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Have a problem with your network? Just call your friendly neighborhood network administrator, and he'll fix you right up.

No, wait, we farmed him out to a customer.

[#] Tue Oct 27 2015 09:48:00 EDT from fleeb

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You might have the impression that our morale is low here.

I'm not sure why anyone would think that.

[#] Tue Oct 27 2015 15:00:47 EDT from fleeb

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Management promises Group A that combining with Group B will give them the resources they need to accomplish their goals.

Management then promises Group B that combining with Group A will give them the resources they need to accomplish their goals.

Both groups A and B have buried in work, but somehow, by combining them, you will manage to have less work to do, not simply twice the work with twice the people.

[#] Fri Oct 30 2015 15:17:55 EDT from IGnatius T Foobar

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What is this strange word "people" you are using?

Always refer to your employees as "resources." It makes them feel special knowing that they are exchangeable commidities.

[#] Mon Nov 02 2015 10:52:35 EST from fleeb

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Yeah, it's especially interesting the complete lack of regard for the human equation on all of this. Just brains in flesh pots that can all do the same tasks regardless of specialty.

[#] Tue Dec 01 2015 15:30:30 EST from Ladyhawke

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Haven't you noticed that these days brains are no longer necessary?  Today, only breathing is required to be considered an adequate replacement for highly trained talent.  After all, they can't ell the difference....why would they think someone else could....right?

[#] Fri Jan 08 2016 13:03:33 EST from anonymous

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Lost another one.

They keep firing people.

The icecaps are melting.

[#] Mon Jan 11 2016 13:46:26 EST from fleeb

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I have a pretty simple set of priorities.

First, ensure you have done what customers need.

Next, handle anything else.

That doesn't appear to be our documentation team's priority. They would rather work on frivolous documentation that the customer will never see before working on anything facing the user.

I've never experienced a more masterbatory documentation team than what we have here.

[#] Tue Jan 19 2016 11:50:46 EST from fleeb

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Does it *have* to use the verb 'to be' in nearly every sentence? Do military customers really benefit in having such terrible English? Can we not write something pleasing for both military and civilian customers?

Or do we just have terrible writers?

[#] Wed Mar 02 2016 10:09:11 EST from IGnatius T Foobar

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I entered a conference room yesterday after coming in straight from the outdoors, still wearing my trenchcoat and fedora.  Several cow-orkers said I looked like Inspector Gadget.  None of them knew that used to be my screen name (from 1982 until 1990).  I also didn't know that "fedora shaming" was a thing.  Am I part of a protected class now?

[#] Wed Mar 02 2016 13:22:12 EST from zooer

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Fee Dora the exploror image



[#] Thu Mar 03 2016 10:14:09 EST from IGnatius T Foobar

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Yeah, that photo keeps popping up everywhere.  Who the heck is it?

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