"I wanna smoke a blunt with this guy and have him teach me everything he knows."
-- some dude on YouTube, talking about me
I'm not sure whether "smoking a blunt" is so compatible with "teaching"
"Tell me a little more about... personal computers."
-- Satan, "Time Bandits"
"Sometimes if you want to have fun you have to dress lame."
"everyone involved in that dispute has obviously been huffing unicorn farts for so long that oxygen no longer reaches their brains in appreciable quantities"
"While it is true that you learn with age, the down side is that what you learn is often what a damn fool you were before."
-- Thomas Sowell
"The back of my hand smells like burnt pork."
"Verbing nouns weirds language."
-- Bill Watterson via Calvin & Hobbes.