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[#] Mon Oct 04 2010 13:31:58 EDT from IGnatius T Foobar @ Uncensored

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I want to be able to Blow Stuff Up (tm) without having to join the military.
Can you just send over a bunch of big GPS-guided weapons?

[#] Mon Oct 04 2010 14:07:26 EDT from Sig @ Uncensored

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If I had any.  =)  We're the nasty guard--we just turned in our muskets for M-16A2s a few years ago.



[#] Mon Oct 04 2010 21:09:46 EDT from Sig @ Uncensored

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We had the unpleasant experience of counseling a junior soldier in the company about the commander's intent to discharge him for unsatisfactory participation. He's been with us three years without being able to pass the physical fitness test; we SHOULD have discharged him a year and a half ago. He gets an attitude with his first-line leader, is habitually late, and is just generally a poor example of a soldier, even by our relatively undemanding standards.

And yet... He's a nice, likable kid. When he's sober and on time, he does decent work without complaint. He's been unemployed for two years, other than his one-weekend-a-month, and has a wife and two kids, plus another for whom he's paying support. This is his best shot at getting out of the hole he is in. But he won't take it.

We did everyone the regs required and quite a bit more to get him marriage and financial counseling. My supply sergeant has gone way above and beyond to try to convince him to help himself.  But ultimately, it is his responsibility. None of us feel good about it at ALL because he's a part of the family, even if he's the shady cousin who nicks the silverware. You can't save people from themselves.



[#] Mon Oct 04 2010 22:27:59 EDT from Ford II @ Uncensored

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Interesting, it might actually be easier to fire somebody from the armed forces than the private sector. Hadn't thought of that before.

[#] Mon Oct 04 2010 22:43:07 EDT from Sig @ Uncensored

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If you do the paperwork right (which is a big if), it's relatively easy, though time consuming.  Sadly, he could be JUST a complete dirt bag and the chain of command might insist that he stick around.  But since he's a kinda dirt bag who can't pass his APFT, the regulations require us to give him the boot.



[#] Tue Oct 05 2010 18:26:56 EDT from triLcat @ Uncensored

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In the military, you can't fire someone or even pass him up for promotion for "being a dirtbag." You have to quantify the behavior.

"Has been late X times in the past 3 months"

"Did not pass the physical fitness test"

"Has come to base unshaven"

"Uniform shirt was improperly buttoned and sleeves were rolled up not according to standards despite three previous warnings" (I still remember how to roll up US Army uniform sleeves... You can't just roll them up)

You can't write "has a bad attitude." You have to give specific examples of behaviors that exhibit bad attitude such as breaking protocol, using inappropriate language, yelling at colleagues in situations where yelling is unwarranted...

It's actually not bad to think that way.



[#] Thu Oct 07 2010 15:55:41 EDT from fleeb @ Uncensored

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Today seems to be a day of high-powered stupidity.

It's as if there's some cosmic rays spraying our customers with gamma radiation, but instead of turning into The Incredible Hulk, they just turn stupid.

If I sit still, very quietly, and listen, I can hear the drool running down their face.



[#] Thu Oct 07 2010 20:18:56 EDT from fleeb @ Uncensored

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Yep.  Today was filled with stupidity.

On my way home from work, a lady stopped her car in the middle of the road (in the dark, with her lights on), honked her horn as I approached.  I couldn't get around her car, so I was stuck.  She then got out of the car and scooted some ducks off the road.  This went on for about a full minute.

I wanted to get out of the car and kill the ducks, throwing their remains in her car.



[#] Sat Oct 09 2010 17:26:22 EDT from triLcat @ Uncensored

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not to be stupid, but what would you have her do? run them over?



[#] Sat Oct 09 2010 20:00:17 EDT from IGnatius T Foobar @ Uncensored

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Well, they may be stupid animals but they're not suicidal. If you start moving towards them they *will* get out of the way.

[#] Sun Oct 10 2010 08:17:30 EDT from fleeb @ Uncensored

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Generally speaking, birds are very difficult to hit with a car.  You'll always find exceptions, of course, but as a general rule, you can't hit them with a car.



[#] Sun Oct 10 2010 08:25:39 EDT from triLcat @ Uncensored

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the ducklings can't fly. Ever read "Make Way for Ducklings"?

 



[#] Sun Oct 10 2010 17:47:34 EDT from fleeb @ Uncensored

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Have you ever had someone, in the dark, stop their car just on the other side of a hill on a busy road?



[#] Mon Oct 11 2010 07:59:04 EDT from triLcat @ Uncensored

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oh, forgot about the dark and all that.



[#] Mon Oct 11 2010 14:50:19 EDT from Spell Binder @ Uncensored

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One morning, on my way to work, I had a goose charge at me while turning a corner in the subdivision. My only guess as to why it did that was that it must have been a mother goose protecting her goslings.

[#] Tue Oct 12 2010 09:45:55 EDT from IGnatius T Foobar @ Uncensored

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I'm pretty sure that goslings need protection from oracles, not cars.

[#] Wed Oct 13 2010 07:16:30 EDT from fleeb @ Uncensored

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Now *there's* an image.

"Oh oracle, wise and all-knowing, please tell me how I may achieve never-ending happiness in my life?"

"Not now, son... I'm hunting goslings!"



[#] Mon Oct 18 2010 21:37:48 EDT from IGnatius T Foobar @ Uncensored

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...with an oversized katana, no doubt.

[#] Wed Oct 20 2010 16:21:33 EDT from fleeb @ Uncensored

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*HONK*

*whiff*

-DAMN-



[#] Thu Oct 21 2010 17:12:19 EDT from Harbard @ Uncensored

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Actual conversation at work last night.

 

Dim bulb:  uh, Dan, is it normal for your nose to start bleeding for no reason?

Me:  No. (disbeliving tone to my voice)

Dim bulb:  oh.  I must have bled a gallon of blood.

Me:  Maybe you should ask a doctor about it.

Dim bulb:  Nah.  I'll be okay.

Me:  Well....if it happens again go see a doctor.

Dim bulb:  Okay.  I left a puddle of blood in the back. Should I clean it up?

Me:  uh...yeeees...I don't want to.  Could you not leave the bloody rags on the floor too?  k...thanks.

 



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