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[#] Tue Oct 15 2013 16:46:40 EDT from zooer

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My house burned down in a flash of thunder.
My wife ran off with a one-legged plumber.
My crops fell dead when the riverbed went dry.
My dog got squashed by a pickup truck.
My son ran away and got hooked on drugs.
My daughter's knocked up by the class of '85.

People say that life is good;
It don't seem good to me.
I'm lost without a paddle,
And I'm headed up shit creek.
People say that life is fun,
But I don't know why.
As far as I can tell,
LIFE SUCKS then you die.

The government dumps its toxic waste
Right on top of my mother's grave.
A team of experts say it won't do her no harm.
But my sheep went crazy and killed my mule.
I cut off my dick with a power tool
Fixin' the hole where the meteor hit the barn.
(And it hurt, too!)

[People say life is fair, But I can't take no more.]
People say that life is good,
But I just piss and moan.
I got one foot on a banana
peel,
The other in the Twilight Zone.
People say that life is fun,
But I don't know why.
As far as I can tell,
LIFE SUCKS then you die.

I went to the store to buy some shells.
My gun went off and blew the owner to hell.
Now I'm sittin' here in jail, singin' this song.
And one guy wants to cut me with a knife.
Another guy wants me to be his wife.
Hey, I wish they'd hang me before somethin' really goes wrong!

People say that life is good,
Give thanks for what you have.
When all you have is nothin',
Nothin' makes you glad.
People say that life is fun,
But I don't know why.
As far as I can tell,
LIFE SUCKS, then you die.
I said, people say that life is fun,
But I don't know why.
As far as I can tell,
LIFE SUCKS,
LIFE SUCKS,
LIFE SUCKS, then you die.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gejSEOnaYek

[#] Thu Jul 03 2014 14:52:07 EDT from fleeb

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Huh.

Today, I learned that Norwegian Wood (the name of the song) refers to cheap pine used popularly as panelling in homes back in the 60s. And the last line, 'So I lit a fire, isn't it good, Norwegian Wood' refers to literally burning her home down. I thought it suggested he had a cigarette.

[#] Tue Jul 08 2014 15:38:43 EDT from fleeb

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You can't run away, or they might FREAK OUT.

[#] Tue Jul 08 2014 15:45:54 EDT from fleeb

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The dangerous kitchen
If it ain't one thing it's another
In the middle of the night when you get home
The bread things are all dry 'n' scratchy
The meat things where the cats ate through the paper
The can things with the sharp little edges
That can cut your fingers when you're not looking
The soft little things on teh floor that you step on
They can all be dangerous

Sometimes
The milk can hurt you
(If you pour it on your cereal
Before smelling the plastic container)
And the stuff in the strainer
Has a mind of its own
So be very careful
In the dangerous kitchen
When the night time has fallen,
And the roaches are crawlin'
In the kitchen of danger
You can feel like a stranger

The bananas are black
They've got flies in the back
And also the chicken
In the dish with the foil
Where the cream is all clabbered
And the salad is frightful

Your return in the evening
Can be less than delightful

You must walk very careful
You must not lean against it
It can get on your clothing
It can follow you in
As you walk to the bedroom
and you take all your clothes off
While you're sleeping it crawls off
It gets in your bed
It could get on your face then
It could eat your complexion
You could die from the danger
Of the dangerous kitchen

Who the fuck wants to clean it?

It's disgusting and dirty
The sponge in the drainer
Is stinky and squirty
If you squeeze it when you wipe up
What you get on your hands then
Could unbalance your glands and
Make you blind or whatever
In the dangerous kitchen

At my house tonight

[#] Tue Jul 08 2014 17:44:36 EDT from zooer

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You can't run away, or they might FREAK OUT.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EVZh4WcdC3s&feature=kp

[#] Tue Jul 08 2014 21:13:30 EDT from fleeb

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Oh, god no.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=svdrAHn_LGo

[#] Thu Jul 17 2014 17:23:22 EDT from mo

Subject: Drink up the cider by arfur gott

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Drink up the cider

Drink up the cider

For tonight we'll merry be

we'll knock the milkmaids over 

and roll them in the clover

...



[#] Fri Jul 18 2014 08:17:30 EDT from fleeb

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Roll me over in the clover,
Lay me down, roll me over, do it again.

[#] Tue Jul 29 2014 01:13:07 EDT from ax25

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Tue Jul 08 2014 09:13:30 PM EDT from fleeb @ Uncensored

Heh, mmmmme me me me minnesota.



[#] Mon Sep 15 2014 09:28:33 EDT from IGnatius T Foobar

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It just dawned on me that the song "Disarm" by Smashing Pumpkins contains the following lyric:

"The killer in me is the killer in you"

This proves that homicidal maniacs have their own form of "namaste"

[#] Mon Sep 15 2014 09:56:13 EDT from fleeb

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That oh-so-calm feeling one gets after a murder binge?

[#] Thu Sep 18 2014 07:24:45 EDT from IGnatius T Foobar

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"I have Smashing Pumpkins loaded in the CD player, Clarice."


[#] Thu Oct 02 2014 18:20:18 EDT from zooer

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My house burned down in a flash of thunder,
my wife ran off with a one-legged plumber,
my son ran away and got hooked on drugs,
and my daughter got pregnant by the class of 85.

[#] Fri Oct 10 2014 08:50:49 EDT from fleeb

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Ich have house and land in Kent,
And if you'll love me, love me now;
Two-pence half-penny is my rent, -
Ich cannot come every day to woo.
Two-pence half-penny is his rent,
And he cannot come every day to woo.

Ich am my vather's eldest zonne,
My mouther eke doth love me well!
For Ich can bravely clout my shoone,
And Ich full-well can ring a bell.
For he can bravely clout his shoone,
And he full well can ring a bell.

My vather he gave me a hogge,
My mouther she gave me a zow;
Ich have a god-vather dwells there by,
And he on me bestowed a plow.
He has a god-vather dwells there by,
And he on him bestowed a plow.

One time Iche gave thee a paper of pins,
Anoder time a taudry lace;
And if thou wilt not grant me love,
In truth Ich die bevore thy vace.
And if thou wilt not grant his love,
In truth he'll die bevore thy vace.

Ich have
been twice our Whitson Lord,
Ich have had ladies many vare;
And eke thou hast my heart in hold,
And in my minde zeemes passing rare.
And eke thou hast his heart in hold,
And in his minde zeemes passing rare.

Ich will put on my best white sloppe,
And Ich will weare my yellow hose;
And on my head a good gray hat,
And in't Ich sticke a lovely rose.
And on his head a good grey hat,
And in't he'll sticke a lovely rose.

Wherefore cease off, make no delay,
And if you'll love me, lov eme now;
Or els Ich zeeke zome oder where, -
For Ich cannot come every day to woo.
Or else he'll zeeke zome oder where,
For he cannot come every day to woo.

- Wooing Song of a Yeoman of Kent's Sonne

[#] Sat Nov 22 2014 10:58:46 EST from mo

Subject: Cork

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Beautiful City 

I have sought to discover a haven of rest
Where the sun sinks by night in the land of the West
I have dwelt with the red man in green forest bowers
O'er the wild rolling prairie bespangled with flowers
I have hived to the north, where the hardy pine grows
'Mid the wolf and the bear, and the bleak winter snows
I have roamed through all climates, but none could I see
Like the green hills of Cork and my home by the Lee

Chorus

Beautiful city, charming and pretty
Beautiful city, my home by the Lee

I have slumbered in palm groves by clear running streams
And the wild groves of Blarney come haunting my dreams
I have listened to bells on the soft summer wind
But the sweet bells of Shandon were dear to my mind
I have mixed in gay dances my sorrows to hide
But there's none like the maiden that's now by my side
There is nought in the land of the slave or the free
Like the green hills of Cork and my home by the Lee

Chorus

The bold feudal castles look down on the Rhine
That flows through the land of the olive and vine
There is freedom and health in the fresh mountain breeze
That careers round the home of the brave Tyrolese
There is beauty and love in all spots of the earth
To the heart that can call it the land of its birth
But of all the fair countries, the dearest to me
Are the green hills of Cork and my home by the Lee

Chorus

 

It's one of the official songs of the Irish city of Cork, i live in Kent in England actually (Kent "The Garden of England" full of orchards and green fields) but i know no songs of Kent, my mum and dad ore both Irish however and Cork has many songs about even the smallest part of it. (just came back from holiday camping in Killarney actually :) )

http://www.corkcity.ie/corksongs/  here is where i got the lyrics,  check out the reference to the neihbouring county 'Kerry' (the old enemy, on the football field anyway, this is Gaelic football whioch is far bigger than soccer etc in those counties. My familky straddles both sides of the border and you can see all the flags along the border crossings when the football (gaelic/Irish) championships  (even the local club championships) are on :) ) They great singers over there.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eq7ZkHlLL1M    searched for an audio - this is the best i could find. ( i have all those songs on tape which have very little instrumentation and sound all the better for it)



[#] Wed Feb 03 2016 19:08:27 EST from fleeb

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Look around my rooms
And see the prizes I have showing
Working hard to build my life
And plan the way I'm going
House and car and pretty wife
They've all been won by knowing
All been won by knowing
All been won by knowing
Paperwork, white collared shirts
Where would we be without them
Man of class and quality
I never shout about them
Choose my friends for my own ends
You can't succeed without them
Can't succeed without them
Can't succeed without them
Middleman sees straight ahead
And never crosses borders
Never understood the artist
Or the lazy workers
The world needs steady men like me
To give and take the orders
Give and take the orders
Give and take the orders

[#] Fri Feb 05 2016 16:49:46 EST from LoanShark

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Thanks for that interesting tidbit, mo; my girlfriend is from Cork. I've been there for a couple different Christmases now.

[#] Wed Jun 01 2016 20:44:21 EDT from zooer

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Substitution mass confusion. 



[#] Wed Jun 15 2016 11:48:48 EDT from zooer

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 I don't know why I love her like I do,
 All the changes you put me through. 



[#] Thu Oct 27 2016 11:26:00 EDT from IGnatius T Foobar

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This may be the best song ever.    "Kill Everyone" by Hollywood Undead

You got the motherfucking right to remain violent!
Hollow points hiding in my clip
I'll take 25 just to watch your life end
I pray father please forgive me 'fore I sin
Got these sticks of dynamite and dying to light them
God don't fail me now
Get thrown and you gon' get carried out
To a hole where I know you won't be found
Just face it it's almost over now

Don't even try to take this weapon from me
I like you more and more the lesser you breathe

I've come undone
I think I'll kill everyone
My, what have I done?
Fuck it let's kill everyone

I've come undone
I think I'll kill everyone
My, what have I done?
Fuck it let's kill everyone

Oh no here comes the riot
Does everything have to resort to violence?
If you think you can hide, go and try it
Now let's let the fucking gun break the silence
Close your eyelids
Another shot and then here come the sirens
I thought I told you to keep fucking quiet
Somebody's dying, so come say goodbye kids

Don't even try to take this weapon from me
I like you more and more the lesser you breathe

I've come undone
I think I'll kill everyone
My, what have I done?
Fuck it let's kill everyone

I've come undone
I think I'll kill everyone
My, what have I done?
Fuck it let's kill everyone

Imma take you all down
Sayin' fuck the world now!
Imma take you all out
I'm sayin' fuck the world now!

Imma take you all down
Sayin fuck the world now
Imma take you all out
I'm sayin' fuck the world now!

Don't even try to take this weapon from me (Saying fuck the world now)
I like you more and more the less that you breathe (I'm saying fuck the world now)

I've come undone
I think I'll kill everyone
My, what have I done?
Fuck it let's kill everyone

I've come undone
I think I'll kill everyone
My, what have I done?
Fuck it let's kill everyone