*smile*

obviously, he's going to have to explain to his daughter that stuff that costs money is worth money and all that... so why do we share apples but not pennies... ?

Sucks. Unfortunately, you're going to have to talk it through with the parents or suck it up. Depends how much money it is... If it's under $10, I'd probably just let it go.

Tough one IG.  My son did that with his sisters Gameboy games.  Traded some she liked (but he did not) with a friend for some oddly shaped rubber bands (silly bands I think they were called) that he thought were more valuable at the time :-) 

Not quite the same, but as a younger sibling, he did not take in to consideration "other" costs of that transaction.

sometimes we do races. Sometimes we sing. Sometimes we ask if they want to get dressed the hard way or the easy way. Sometimes we do 'can you show me how you put on a shirt?'

Sometimes giving a choice of 2 outfits... 

Each of them has worked a few times, but every day is a new and unique challenge...

maybe you should find out why he dislikes (these?) clothes? (color, farbic, width?) or whether its rather that he likes m&m's and is clever enough to get them? ;-)

maybe wearking a kaftan is the better alternative to him?

Mistakes for sale!  Get your mistakes, here!  Use 'em on your kids!  Every mistake unique!

Problem is that if you put up a fence to keep your kids out of the street, the day they decide to climb it, they might wind up falling in the street instead of just walking into it... 

You have to teach them all the issues involved in it, and explain to them why it's not good for them, keep it out of your house as much as possible, set a good example, and know that at some point, your child will look at porn, and if you've established it as an absolute evil and completely banished the thought of them looking at it, then any issues that arise as a result will not be brought to you.

My parents were so absolutely against premarital sex that when I was raped, I felt guilty and couldn't go to them. 

Try not to make that kind of mistake with your kids. (Make different ones!)

Yeah, I'm thinking of stuff like netnanny or whatever. To be honest, my issue is less what my kids are looking for than what they stumble upon. I wish it were harder to stumble upon certain things.

I would like sites that are rated R or X to have an entry page that says what kind of garbage you're about to see, the way that tv, movies, and video games do. 

I would like YouTube to have a rating system so that you can restrict your account access to 'G, PG, PG-13, NC-17.' 

I would love it if sites would do this voluntarily. 

I don't like it that I can go to a site which is a non-porn site and see things that I wouldn't see in a rated R movie.

People have the right to put up whatever they want. It would be nice if they'd warn me, though, before I see things that cannot be unseen.

My mom and I were on an email list, and someone accidentally sent heavy S&M pics. My mom was away, so I deleted it from her inbox. She made the foolish decision to look at it, and had bad dreams about it for a couple weeks...

There are things that we should be protected from.

Yes, but the shock might be harder when you are 12 or 14 year old. And rotten really is only the top of the iceberg, the stuff I saw at b0g.org can not be unseen. :( And I do not want to explain my son why a person removes an *beep* from a *beep* and puts it into her *beep*. (Honestly, I do not even want to make you imagine it ;)

At least I hope that he will ask at all and not be traumatized in silence. Thats why I do not want to encourage taboos. Putting the computer in a visible space is like an unspoken taboo, he will get his private time with this computer. If not, it will be at a friends house. Oh the stuff at friends' houses when I was young...

Honestly, pr0n is the least bit I'd be worried about on the internet. There is so much of it that I believe an average 16yr old will be satisfied enough. I think they will either find kinky stuff disgusting or they will like it anyway, even if I try to forbid it.

What really bugs me is stuff like rotten (which is still online and looks like 15 years ago), b0g (which seems to be offline) or even worse pages I do not even know about. But we grew up knowing people with Faces of Death VHS tapes... I wonder wether this hyperavaiablity doesn't have the benefit of making the odd stuff common.

I do know how to filter the internet, but I can only do that at home, not at his friends places or wherever they will find a free/hackable wifi spot. I also do not know if I would want to censor the internet.

I prefer teaching that it's holy and special and not to be taken lightly.

Just like your privates aren't dirty - they're special and not for display.

hmjam, brocoly tuna lasagne.

My mom bought a camcorder in the mid 80s. The whole thing, including the tape and such, sat on your shoulder. Probably only weighed 12-14 lbs. Of course, usually we used it on a tripod. 

These days, I use my regular canon elph for video as well as stills. Silly thing is about the size of a cassette tape, and weighs like 4 oz

crazy.

There's an ISP here that pre-filters, but you end up not really being able to use internet adequately (and when I worked in gambling, well - it filters out all gambling sites.) I prefer the idea of complete transparency. Computer's in the living room. Enjoy!

Bottom line is that

1. What's prohibited seems more attractive. 

2. A 16-year-old will find porn if they really want to. If you actually manage to take away every porn option, they'll find a way to spy on real girls. Not sure having them peek in on their sister in the shower is healthier than checking out Playboy. 

3. I don't mind if he wants to look at sports scores, play stupid games, or write notes to his friends. That's what a normal kid should be doing. Why should I try to keep him from doing those things?!

I mowed the lawn last summer whilst listening to a tape on a walkman (not the brand, but the concept) and my kids thought I was crazy.  I have since moved on to streaming on the phone to a set of headphones and they still think I am a bit of a loon.

Hmm.  Plenty of CH folks use internet...tho they tend to use some strict filtering....

Funny you should mention that IG.  I have a script that logs in to the DSL modem (as it tracks usage) and publishes that to a Google Docs spreadsheet for me.  More of a mental exercise than a practical use for now though.

Another way to keep tabs on what they're doing with the computer is to install software that randomly takes screenshots and sends them to you.  This type of software is in use in a lot of corporate settings where there are strict policies over computer usage, but it also works well for kids.  If they know that at any time you might see what's on the screen, they will be careful.

My stepson is being raised Chabad. From experience, the more you tell kids they shouldn't use internet, the more they find ways to use it when you can't track them. Much better to have a computer in a highly visible place in the house. 

Shazam, I hear you on the saving up for something.  We have used that already and my daughter has already saved up for a tablet.  So that ship has sailed for me.  Unfettered zombie like Internet access is the new "problem" these days.

I was a good kid. 

This was when I was three or four.

My mom once made macaroni and piled it on my plate. I loved pasta, but I wouldn't eat it.

I finally ate ONE piece to make my parents shut up.

2 hours later, I threw up. 

They never doubted me when I said I wasn't hungry again.

oh, this can be a razor blade decision flipping from one second to another at kids.

My jeans once was a witness of that ;-(

The fresh artwork on the room wall witnessed that it can last as long as a 270 degrees turn :]

Hopefully, she can tell now.  :-/

Fri Oct 26 2012 04:11:45 PM EDT from Shazam @ Uncensored

That's almost like not a kid anymore. As we get older we will need a new room called "Raising Adults"

I agree at both ends.  I have a 12 y.o. going on 13 rapidly (and earestly awaits facebook-dom), but I would rather have her visit such a place as a local bbs  I am nostalgic for the past (as my mother was), but I hope for a better future.  I feel that I am a failure because I could not devine the path for them.

Only if you can give that many....

Come to Massachussets, where getting high is only as far away as the nearest prescription pad.

The decision now is that until and unless there is a major improvement in my health, another pregnancy is off the table. 

Should we not reach the point of my being able to tolerate a pregnancy by the time I'm 37, we'll probably call it.

yep, 34. 

K is in kindergarten, e is in preschool. We're paying about $250/month on daycare, and k comes home at 2 now (E at 5). 

We can afford another one, but my health is a problem. I'm guessing if I got pregnant right now, I would spend at least 2 months on bedrest - more likely closer to 4.

My (husband's) oldest is 15, but he lives in Pittsburgh, so we don't see him enough.

I have Kinneret - 5

and Ephraim - 3.5

I'm really starting to want another...

She's 7 already? Wow.

Isn't it fun having older kids? 

My Adina became a Bat Mitzvah last spring. Shlomo is praticing learning to read Torah for his Bar Mitzvah. Turns out he's a bit tone deaf. 

Akiva is turning 11 in a month and is asking for all kinds of birthday presents. 

Yaakov turned 2 two months ago. He is a real terror. I think he's teething those 2-year-old molars. 

mmm....blueberries!

Yes, and in one parallel universe, Finland is the promised land, and we have blueberry pies all summer long.

Don't be sad, TriL!  

In some universe version, the cat's just helping Chippy there cross the yard safely. 

I am sad now

That Toon cracked me up.  

Gah!

Great -maybe they'll learn how to guard the snowblower from Aahz!

Meh, it'll just comb over.

but everyone who looks at her for the next year will wonder what happened to her. She looks like a cancer patient.

probably depends how bad she does with that comb to pull the nests out of the hair?

I would have prefered to get my hair cut instead of having them pulled out with that damn comb way back then.

People I know and am marginally friends with came to synagogue Friday night with 2 bald kids - boy and girl. The kids had lice, and the mom decided to shave their heads. Boy is in kindergarten, girl is 2 years old...

I'm horrified. I think it's abuse (at least for the girl). Opinions?

btw, I wouldn't hesitate to give a boy a crew cut for lice, but for a girl... I don't think I'd cut it any shorter than just above the shoulders no matter how bad the case of lice was.

IGlet never liked the idea of the tooth fairy -- he always insisted on leaving his teeth on the kitchen table so the tooth fairy wouldn't be prowling around in his room.

my children are learning about the tooth fairy now from Yo Gabba Gabba. yipes. We don't have a tooth fairy in our family.

agreed...

there's also a sceene in one episode about your internal organs...

The creepiest, most disturbing song from that show is this:

http://yogabbagabba.com/?setEntryID=290#/party-in-my-tummy

My son has an emphatuation with Yo Gabba Gabba and some other kids cartoons on Nickelodeon (Fairly Odd Parents, The Muppet Show, Sesame Street [pbs], Foster's Home for Imaginary Friends [CartoonNetwork])

He sings almost every song from Yo Gabba Gabba... kinda creepy sometimes. He's not much for Diego/Dora but will watch them if that's his only choice.

My kids are currently obsessed with Diego. On one of the episodes we have, they sing "Go to sleep, go to sleep, go to sleep, tornado"

It's so sweet hearing my son (age 2) sing it...all day...and all night...

Tue Mar 08 2011 07:26:37 AM EST from IGnatius T Foobar @ Uncensored

There are worse ways you could spend Mail Time. I think you should sing along :)

(Or you could run through the streets shouting "I got MAIL! Somebody loves meeeee...!"

Oh, I definitely sing along.

He's lately really started to sing a lot.  Mostly stuff from his class at church:  "the B-I-L-L-B song" is one of his favorites.

so a friend of mine has a new vehicle:

http://dryadesgedanken.blogspot.com/2011/03/das-babboe-ist-da.html

you can see her daughter testing the passenger seat.

We taught Kinneret Bingo as "There was a mommy had a dog and Poofy was his name-o, P-O-O-F-Y..." She thinks it's P-O-O-Ephraim. I admit that Ephraim sounds like FYim, but it totally cracks me up.

Depends how much one-on-one you've spent with your kids that day. There are some times that I'd rather watch paint dry than spend another hour listening to whining and fighting...

Sat Jan 22 2011 12:02:03 PM EST from Sig @ Uncensored Subject: Re:

I love spending time with my children, but not to the absolute exclusion of everything else I like to do.

Thu Jan 20 2011 07:50:02 AM EST from IGnatius T Foobar @ Uncensored

Choosing a Drupal installation over spending time with your kids == fail.

 

I love spending time with my children, but not to the absolute exclusion of everything else I like to do.

Thu Jan 20 2011 07:50:02 AM EST from IGnatius T Foobar @ Uncensored

Choosing a Drupal installation over spending time with your kids == fail.

This is my daughter's first patent application.

(If you can't see the image, go to http://i53.tinypic.com/2woyr11.jpg to see it)

She calls it "The CraneWhacker." The driver (1) sits in the cab (2) and propels the vehicle, whose engine presumably expels some exhaust (3). While the front-mounted shovel (4) plows the snow, the top-mounted shovel (5) whacks the icicles off the roof of your house.

She just took both kids to a play date for a few hours, meaning I actually get free time on my day off!  Huzzah!

Installing Drupal 7 in a virtual machine in 3... 2... 1...

That would be a 'handicap' in golfing terms, rather than the traditional meaning.

Hmm... if all European children are handicapped, what becomes of their adulthood?

my kids can get in/out of any door all the time. When we're in the house, we lock the door to the outside. We're hoping that they won't be strong and coordinated enough to use the key until they're old enough to not play in traffic and such.

Wow!  If we had those kind of doors when IGlet was young, we would have to nail the door shut and pry it open everytime we needed to leave the house.  Maybe it would have be easier to climb  out a window.  My only way of keeping him in the house was locking the door.  He would have been out in a heartbeat.

In the US, you can find that style of doorknob on doors intended for handicapped people.

IG: it's the long, hook-shaped, flat handle ones they have in europe, like some car doors have, except these turn, not pull. Normally they're positioned so all you have to do is push down on the handle to get a door open. if you turn it veritcal instead of horizontal, you have to pull it to one side to get the door to open.

-- 
Stephen D King
Network Admin
Blurred Vizion Studios
outsider@blurredvizionstudios.com

In America, door knobs are round. They're a bit harder to open than European doors. I remember having trouble with door knobs, which means I was still having trouble with some door knobs at age 3.

The Israeli ones can't be turned, so my kids can open doors. When my stepson was here, whenever he left the room, he locked the door to his room (leaving the key in the lock so we could get back in easily) to keep the kids out. The one time he forgot, the floor got a dusting to an inch of foot powder...

so... did you turn the door-knob of the important doors already vertical? ;-) or don't they reach the horizontal ones yet?

and probably no baakfiets either?

such a nihola is a cool thang. or a long john...

I think it's all somehow made more complicated by the fact that I don't have a car.

Sun Jan 09 2011 10:05:09 AM EST from triLcat @ Uncensored

Yaakov went to the the US for a week. Since he left on Thursday morning: our X-box died. My laptop is overheating (while I'm on a major project on a tight deadline and my desktop is not capable of handling moviemaker.) The desktop is acting up (but hopefully not too badly) and Ephraim has a fever.

Also, I've cleaned pee off the floor 5 times. (2 K, 1 E, and 2 the dog.)

And dog vomit once.

I think there should be laws against fathers traveling for business.

 

This is the sort of scenario I envisioned when they asked me if I wanted to go to Korea for 3 weeks this summer.

Yaakov went to the the US for a week. Since he left on Thursday morning: our X-box died. My laptop is overheating (while I'm on a major project on a tight deadline and my desktop is not capable of handling moviemaker.) The desktop is acting up (but hopefully not too badly) and Ephraim has a fever.

Also, I've cleaned pee off the floor 5 times. (2 K, 1 E, and 2 the dog.)

And dog vomit once.

I think there should be laws against fathers traveling for business.

any lawyers in our midst?

I'm trying to figure out whether we have a case with the custody situation...

it's a sticky one, international and all.

How his mother ended up with sole custody is complicated. It was basically done without my husband's legal consent - but he didn't fight it. They had lived in Israel during their marriage and his son was born in Israel, so it should have been illegal for her to leave the country with him.

Up until now, we've believed that the child's interest was best served by living with his mother, but he is now in boarding school, so no longer living with his mother. Better schooling options are available in our area meaning he could live with us or at least come home more often than once a month. Problem is, of course, that his mom doesn't want him across an ocean.

blech.

Hey, congrats to everyone assimilated by new little-people!

My almost-3 son sings along with his favorite music video:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eMqsWc8muj8

[Only a minute or so.  I'm not cruel.]

hm.

http://www.npr.org/blogs/money/2010/08/20/129328075/the-tuesday-podcast-allowance-economics

Ha, there's something to that.  Ian had more of a "we shall fight them in the hills, we shall never surrender" sort of vibe going.

We bought a miniDV camera just prior to Ian's birth.  It's a Sony (I was drunk) (No, really, I was).  We used it for a grand total of about 40 minutes of footage between birth and first birthday, and haven't used it since; he's now almost 3.  Last night I finally installed a firewire card in my computer, captured the video, created menus and things using the software, and made a DVD ISO which I then burned and tested on my DVD player before going to bed.  This took about two and a half hours--or four times as much as I used the camera in the last three years.

Right now, Nathan kinda looks like he could command groups of people to "make it so".

Ian and the new guy, Nathan.

Then, excellent!

Gratz to all!

Although, seeing your niece involves dealing with your sister, doesn't it, IG?

Nathan Emry August, born 2308 on Thursday night.  7 lbs, 6 oz, 20".  Mommy and baby are fine.  Daddy is less of a wreck after four hours of sleep.

That's one of those cartoons I haven't seen, but I really, really want to.

We're still waiting.  I'm on leave until next Friday (at which point things start piling up catastrophically), so hopefully he'll make an appearance sooner rather than later.

Anyone ever seen The Iron Giant (1999)?  It's a cartoon, but it was the first DVD I ever bought (before I had a player).  Quick summary: Amnesiac robot from outer space befriends rural kid while hiding from fearful gov't agent in 1957 America.  There's a sequence at the end where the robot thinks the kid has been killed and he turns into a walking engine of destruction.  These little tendrils pop out of his shoulders and start shooting beams, and a big armor plate moves up from his chest revealing a massive cannon.  He starts stalking down toward the town.

Ian has taken to emulating the robot at various points while watching this movie.  At this point, he lifts his shirt (armor) up and tucks it under his chin, then raises his arms to simulate laser tendrils, and starts stalking up and down the living room mechanically.  We saw it twice before we caught on to what he was doing; he rarely sits still for movies, so it didn't immediately grab our attention.  It is powerfully cute.

Joe, if I have it right.

What's the baby called?

Wow Sig, great news.  Wishing you guys an easy and safe  birth and friendly nurses at the hospital!

Hey guys, I have a baby.  I know it sounds crazy, but I don't think I'm hallucinating. This is SO cool. There's this little person named Joe asleep on my chest even as I type this.

I think I'm in love.

Wow, I've missed a lot, I guess.  That'll teach me to take an 80 hr/wk job...

Mazel Tov, Shazaam!

And Sig, I don't believe we've met, but congrats to you, too!

Mazel Tov Shazam and Sig!

My son is the best part of taking a day off.  I stayed up until midnight last night goofing off on the computer, and woke up this morning to Ian patting me gently on the head.  I turned my head.  "Hi, Daddy!"  That's so much better than my alarm clock.

He just spent half an hour sitting in my lap watching Russian music videos on YouTube, nodding his head and tapping on the desk and just generally rocking out.  I finally found someone else who likes Lumen.

You're starting to sound like Monkey Dusts's Timmy Visits Daddy bit.

You might find some other things happen between those two points in time.

That's good because the return policy on those things is draconian, and I didn't even get a receipt.

Siglet #2 is due 21 October.  We should probably start planning for that.

Thankyou! The baby was born 2 weeks ago today, 2 weeks early (Today was the "due date") and he was 5lbs, 11oz. He had his bris on time and we named him Yaakov Yosef. His second name, Yosef, is after my grandpa Joe, and I've been alternating sometimes calling him Yaakov and sometimes calling him Joe.

He's cute. We like him.

gratz!

Shazam had a baby boy! Woot!

IG- encouraging enthusiasm is great, but helping him hash out the idea a little more firmly would probably be a good idea too. For example, would people be able to apply for an e-z pass reduction based on financial need if they work at low-paying jobs?

IGlet has a big heart and a creative spirit.  He wants to start a charity called "Cars for Change" and he's even writing a letter to the New York State Thruway Authority with his proposal (complete with a map).  Here's what he wrote (handwritten letter, transcribed by me for posting).  I'll probably attach a cover letter before sending it to the Thruway Authority ... with any luck it'll be received by someone willing to write back to him.

<!-- @page { margin: 0.79in } P { margin-bottom: 0.08in } -->

August 14, 2010

Dear New York State Thruway Authority,

I am Wesley. I am 10 years old. And I love the highways.

But I have an idea to do a Cars for Change donation to help people get across highways who are having trouble driving. So here's how it goes. The people driving on a highway have a choice to do the donation or not so you can donate money from $0.25 to $1.00. It can use EZ-Pass but money chosen at random but only to 75 cents. Anyone with cars, trucks, buses, and trailers can do the donation.

So try starting it on Moshulu Parkway first to see how it goes then try it on interstate 684 if it goes ok. Then put it on all interstates. Do you think you can try that for me? I have a map to show you.

Thanks

from Wesley

My 7 year old decided she didn't want her 2 top front teeth any more.  Well, not really, but after a fall in a grocery store, lots of bleeding and a trip to the dentist, it had the same results.  One tooth out, another pulled at the dentist. (also knocked loose after the fall)  Both baby teeth, but I don't think fully rooted teeth would have come out that easily.  Since the one chipped also, I'm glad they were still her baby ones.

have a real talk with him about how money works - that even if these things cost a lot, you'll still find ways to have food to eat and a place to live, that maybe you'll have to be careful to buy less clothes or cheaper clothes or be more careful to buy food on sale, but you won't be hungry and you'll be ok. Tell him how much money you earn in an hour and go to the store and show him a package of pasta and have him do the math about how much pasta you can buy with just one hour of work. Show him a bunch of different foods, and see how much food you can buy with three hour's salary. It's an interesting exercise in general. Might give him an understanding of why you'd say (for example) that a cereal is too expensive, even if you really CAN afford it.

It was always hard for me to understand why a $3 box of cereal was too expensive but a $5 shirt wasn't...

Or, if you can't, maybe not.  Heh.

I don't think that kids should be kept away from everything. You just should try to find understandeable words.

a family is there to stand together and to share sorrow and happiness.

You probably should mention the value you get for that decision.

Each person has different abilities, you can only hope each parent is parenting to the best extent of their abilities. I've found most parents love their children immensely, but that doesn't automatically translate into making good parenting choices.

I've recently been critisized that I share too much information with the kids. When I stopped to think about it,  I really do tend to tell them too much. I have been sharing with them how much things cost regarding the new house, now Shlomo is worried that we won't be able to afford our bills. The other two are a lot more relaxed, but Shlomo's become really nervous. That's not right for a 10 year old to worry like that and I now wish I'd kept my mouth shut about the cost of the contractors needed to bring the house up to code and the cost of all the repairmen to fix all the various things that broke as soon as we moved in and whether or not we can afford a new roof. I've been worrying out loud about what the utility and water bills will be, when I should have been quiet when kids were around me. Poor parenting choice. But I love my kids to the ends of the world.

If love was all that was needed to raise healthy, happy, well-adjusted kids, I'd be set. Too bad life just isn't that easy.

my kids are out of bed at 11:30pm. oh no!

We're in a hotel room in St Petersburg (Russia, not Florida)

uh oh. must get back into the fray

Di Jul 27 2010 16:26:25 EDT von Ragnar Danneskjold @ Uncensored

I don't believe that for a second. Most kids I've seen from "extra-affectionate" parents are spolied little brats.

i'd say it depends on the way they do that effort.If its to tightly say what to do and so on, or it goes into the cocker direction, you're probably right.

It'd be interesting if one could prove genetics or environment on this.

Ragnar:

I think 'extra-affectionate' in this sense doesn't mean that the parents are giving a lot of material things to the kid... just that they're extremely loving, and showing of that love, while the kid is still an infant.

Wow!! I'm more thrown by the comments after that article.  Whole life stories chronicled there - whoa!! The Captain has turned on the no sharing sign.  I got to spend time with a child who has the same diagnois as mine and is about the same age a little while ago and the differences were dramatic.  The other mom was much less attentive - she misplaced his script that he had carefully underlined and highlighted and forgot to send in his lunch with him.   (Though to be perfectly honest - I have almost forgot to throw the lunch bag in the backpack several times so lunch dropping off is in my future)  A friend of mine knows this family and commented that my kid can navigate better through situations - of course we spend an enormous amount of time prepping and rehearsing situations with him - but I was thinking about this kid today - he isn't a bad kid - he just needs some attention and TLC.  I did the only thing I could think of which was to say a little prayer that he was having a good day and that pe

I just get frustrated when people treat kids like accessories - of course I also think carrying a little dog in your purse is annoying too!

done next generation aid today:

technical bike training.

standing up while cycling, riding with one hand off, breaking with the vbrakes without skidding, and sprint training with proper shifting.

the only thing we didn't get done is getting off without sitting, so the seat post could have been raised to a propper heeight...

My daughter is watching Monty Python's Flying Circus. (mwahhahahahaaaa)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BPhRiaNW4UQ

teeth pulling in the 21st century

Also, don't do this to your child:

http://www.dula.tv/blog/wp-content/uploads/2009/08/Kid-is-jabba-the-hut1.jpg

Don't let your kid become an actress or an actor.  At least not until they're old enough.

http://pogpog.com/v/little-drama-queen/